As Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu continues his genocidal campaign across Gaza, anti-war student demonstrators across the United States are dramatically increasing pressure for peace. Armed with only tents and sleeping bags, they demanded that educational institutions divest Israel's war machine. While some school administrators have listened to student concerns by changing investment policies to align with students' values, most have responded violently. The military is being deployed to brutally silence people exercising their First Amendment rights. Nearly 3,000 protesters have been arrested so far, and Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and some members of the US House of Representatives are calling for a tougher, more violent crackdown.
As a Jew, I am in awe of the young people of all backgrounds who come together to resist Israel's genocide against Palestine. It is inspiring to see so many young anti-Zionist Jews stand up to incredible pressure with such clear moral stance. I also look on with some guilt in my heart. It's not easy to accept that, at their age, I was a cheerleader for the very nation-state responsible for its development today.
I hope that others like me, who grew up believing that our survival depended on Israel's strength, will realize that Israel now poses a threat to all of us as a species.
As a child, Zionism was a deep part of my identity. I grew up Jewish in a segregated Jewish community. When I was in elementary school, I went to a Jewish community center for after-school programs and summer camps. When I was in middle school, I had two or three bar and bat mitzvahs every weekend. For as long as I can remember, my relatives have always been deeply connected to the idea of ​​a Jewish homeland. We were raised to believe that without Israel, Jews would not be safe in the world.
This was reaffirmed to me when I was 16 and enrolled in the JNF-sponsored Alexander Muss High School program in Israel. I spent his summer of 1987 living in a college dormitory in Hod Hasharon, learning about what I thought was real history. We realized that much of what we learned was part of the Zionist myth created in 1948. I fell in love with what I thought was the Jewish homeland but was actually Palestine.
In retrospect, the signs of a Zionist military state are clear. I was there the summer before the first intifada, and the wall and separation roads had not yet been built. Although there were no obvious signs of apartheid, they were still often escorted by armed guards. I can't believe we were being taken to a place where we needed assault rifles to protect ourselves. We traveled back and forth through areas of the West Bank that are known to have been and are still occupied. We were taken to East Jerusalem to plant trees. As a mother, all I can see is that we were unarmed teenagers who were being used as “human shields” and tools of ethnic cleansing.
It was in the early 2000s during the Second Intifada that I began to see increased violence against Palestinians and more obvious signs of apartheid. I knew that Israel continued to build settlements in occupied territory, despite violating international law. It was also around this time that I learned about the BDS movement, which was born in Palestine. Soon after, several US states found themselves enacting anti-BDS legislation. I believe this violates my First Amendment rights.
It took me about 15 years to reach a level of anger towards the state of Israel. In 2019, I still wanted her two-state solution. But the Zionists have made it abundantly clear that they will not abide by a Palestinian state. Our world has watched as Prime Minister Netanyahu's far-right government inflicted inexplicable fear on the Palestinian people. Bombing of hospitals and schools. Mass grave. Execution. Historically, these acts of violence have been so heinous that international organizations have developed treaties to prevent us from making the same mistakes. Yet, even as tragedies unfold before our eyes, most leaders turn a blind eye. If this is their distorted truth, I choose to take them at their word.
Learning and confronting the truth about Zionism's ideology and history was a painful process. To do this, I needed to unravel my memories of the joy, laughter, and excitement of my formative childhood, my early years, and reconstruct them in a true context. I had to reexamine the multi-generational foundations of my family and came to the understanding that they were inconsistent with the basic truths of humanity and peace that I hold dear.
I accepted that I would spend the rest of my life trying to make up for being a useful idiot. That is a very small cross to bear. I hope that others like me, who grew up believing that our survival depended on Israel's strength, will realize that Israel now poses a threat to all of us as a species. We must make clear the truth that genocide is underway and Israel is responsible for it.
Just as young people are advancing liberation movements by standing up to their systems, we must do the same. My redemption now and in the future is to use my voice to fight for the freedom of Palestinians and their right to live in the land they call home.
